To some1 I long for

Your beauty is a thief
that stole the gasp from my lungs;
a warden who dictate the will of my desires;
like acid poured into junkie's cut
your beauty is both a bane and delight.

How could it be good
when all suffering and heartache
is trace of your beauty?
Yet in someway,
that acid could bring blissful temptation
that burns and devour any defiance

Your beauty indeed inspired vanity!
when all have crumbled before you
and lover's heart, battered to decay;
there's always one that begs of you
a last glimpse, a last tidings,
a chance to envisage the presence of you.

Battered me if not put me to shambles!
Make me the last remnant of your victims!
The sight of you is enough to take me;
The gift from you is my coerced heart
that chain me into absolute love;
Then, I am yours.

Feelin just a lil bit betrayed..

Wind blows away da dust that gathers round da candle...
Dust of hate, lust, treason, and betraying agony is swept away amid storms of rage..
Rage that is awaken by tiny fraction of heat generated within candle's light...

I have once and promised myself not to ever again seek deep into source of secrecy...
While better informed i may be, yet the secrets of one's lover can be quite agonizing to the other.
Yet, here i am... doing it again..

Not because curiosity like before, nor it ever because of jealousy...
I do it, because i have nothing else to do at that time...
Killing time? how bout killing your heart...

As strong one lover's feeling for the other...
Being able to withstand storms and rage of sky like shakespeare told..
The heart is fragile in nature...

Alas, It is not hate nor even emptiness that i felt...
A little bit of rage, maybe..
Now.. I'm feeling just a little tad of betrayed...

Can't stand da heat?

Heat.... can't stand it, can't lived without it...

what kind of heat i despised most??
I despised heat of love... the passion with some1 ya love...
heat that comes from love's burning flame, could do anything..
make's everything unpredictable, either for good or bad.

everytime i could sense that kind of heat... i'll do everything to wither it down..
why??
why could some1 even want to wither da flamin burnin heat of love??
becouz if it burns bright n hot... it may looks beautiful, even it may taste like heavenly wonders... too bad, that kind of euphoric moments only to be burnt to soon...

moments... while it can be preserved in toughts or material way, it still sting like a bee to remember it when all round seems cold ...


what kind of heat you despised??

in the end... we're not all alike...

When i was a kid, rubbin' me nose round da web... i was 6 Yo.
Back then, i was mesmerized by da total awesomeness of so called "internet"
you can gain access to anywhere, anyplace, any virtual information without takin ya butt from seat..

Then, i stumbled upon .gov thingy... i can't snoop around it.. but i'm a kid restless at heart..
so, begath is my search for penetrating any walls...
and it is sooooooo easy to get help....

back then, if you know where to find (usually bbs)... there it is... hack tools, crackin tools, even gizmo for creating a mutating virii is everywhere... you name it, the net got it all!
and it is clean, no scam, no back-end, no fuzz... plus it works! even the clumsy crackerjack..

imagine... back then, 6-8 year old relying on scripted tools could penetrated, defaced, even take-over any site... and i mean ANY! ---hence da name script kiddies
heck, when i'm 14, i could wizz myself through my girl's email account... both yahoo and hotmail only after 10 minutes of search how to break webmails.. (only to learn that too much informations.. could hurt)

my point is.... back then.. while some might say that chaos is takin place... even a kid, real kid, could break pentagon... but at least, information is free... free for those who really want it....

now... all the l33t ones have either gone sour like crossing sides or even take a hike... or they have make it all for their own profit... currency profit...

nowadays, there's scammin everywhere.... tools that dirty and even outright predatory to it's user...
and might i dare say... there's almost(maybe?) no l33t ones left in our side...only pretenders, wannabe, or dreamers that dreams someday they got cought then employed with gazillion bucks ahead.. shame on them

bottom line is... where is the sense of 'freedom of information'? what happens to the beautiful world described in the mentor's manifesto? what is it with all the scam, trojan, and phising with hack tool's front?



nb: if i recalled.. hacker for hired once called samurais??
well... these days... i bet there's like only 1 samurais to thousands fakey... meh

ChiL a BiT

Today's like a freakin show...
Wake up late da time is slow..
Hear a knock from who i don't know...
Open da door n there she is white as snow...
can't understand why i acted like dumb cow....
she's there i don't care how..
turns out she just askin can i move my car now....

if life is rime, then my rime is low...

Beuh...

Secepat kilat kau terlena
badai demi badai kau terjang
untuk dimensi lima yang fana
membuat akal sehatmu melayang

Saat kau dalam pelukan mereka
tak lagi kau sudi memandang
kini kau pun merana
meratapi hidup yang terbuang

Kau menyesal walau sia-sia
tiada lagi alasan untuk berjuang
tiada lagi nikmat yang kau rasa
dalam sepi... jiwamu melayang...

[Not] Extreme Way

1. Find da good stuff
2. Look ur bank account
3. Bought or trade up
4. Put da stuff in one piece
5. Check whether or not all in place
6. Get a paper and pen/pencil or whatever u can find
7. Trial n Error
8. Write couple most suitable n stable combination at the moment
9. Re-check all the stuff especialy da heat...
10. put da highest stake written in ur pad
11. test it
12. Cross ur finger...

Wish life is that easy...

Show Em...

To have no one remember u....
that's nothin....
To owe somethin to someone else...
That's nothin...
To be hated by ur friends....
That's nothin....

nothin can compared the agony of...
To be forgotten yet u still remember...
To be owed but no one admited...
To be someone that no one had a feel for...

It ain't easy to forget the past, especially if it meant somthin for u....